AWARENESS IS KEY TO ULTIMATE SUCCESS
Throughout my life I have had my eyes forced WIDE open more than once. I actually wrote this blog over six months ago but I’ve held it back for various reasons and sat on it a few times, but I feel like now I am ready to share it. I have learnt SO much more since initially writing this piece and I probably (actually, most definitely) will have absorbed more by the time some of you get to read this. That’s the thing about putting pen to paper (or fingers to keys), as soon as you write something down you learn something new! It’s for this reason that I also started the Body + Mind Factory Podcast where my co-host, Domonic Bedggood and I chat in real time with guests or each other about thoughts, musings and opinions on everything MOVEMENT, COMMUNITY and MINDSET. If you are enjoy what you find here at the BMF Crew I highly encourage you to check out our podcast on iTunes and subscribe! Clink the link here.
At the time of writing this blog I believed there are three phases to true awareness – DENIAL, AWARE BUT NOT THERE and AWAKENED + PRESENT. My ideas change all the time and I’ve tried to write this blog several times as I feel this is a massive key to success and wanted to do it justice. I still don’t know if this will land with everyone and though my ideas continually change I still believe that AWARENESS is key.
Awareness is being conscious of everything around you. Your actions. The reactions from these actions. Your energy. The way you present yourself to others. Plus knowing that you ultimately can’t control how others react to you. That’s the ultimate conundrum- knowing that you always have to show up with your best self to aim for the best outcomes but knowing that sometimes you may not be able to control the outcome of others.
Awareness allows you to see where people are coming from so you can take yourself out of the situation and not make everything seem so personal (AKA – IT’S NOT ALWAYS ABOUT YOU). Allowing yourself to not always be perfect and being able to apologise for your short comings but never belittling yourself means that you are more self-aware. Knowing that you don’t know everything but can be working towards bettering yourself and accepting others help is a sign of being an ultimate student. We should never stop being students in our own lives.
Denial Phase
Unfortunately we all generally start in this denial phase. We make every excuse under the sun, blame others for everything that goes wrong, have no gratitude, and are completely unaware that our daily actions are killing ourselves and/or our relationships.
Obvious examples are abusive or toxic relationships, excessive alcohol/drug consumption, lying, overeating, self-loathing, playing the victim in every situation etc etc.
Opening your eyes before the big crash is imperative here. Otherwise things snowball and if things are really bad you’re looking down the barrel of severe illness, depression, loss of business, relationship breakdowns and even death. Opening your eyes to becoming aware will help to avoid these situations or at least try and turn them around.
Aware But Not There Phase
It’s a tough phase to be in but as long as you’re no longer in the denial phase blaming others and making excuses, you will see that it is YOU that has control over your actions. This often means massive hurdles or things you need to change or let go of but you’re absolutely on your way. Yes there is a lot of emotion in this phase, but keep pushing and working on yourself. You need more exploration, more education, more personal development and better circles.
Awakened and Present Phase
You see things as they are. You still make mistakes but you can see why and try to rectify the situation. You will be more empathetic to others and you don’t try and control each and every situation. You take on new challenges without the fear of failing or being embarrassed as you are aware you are a student at the beginning of all new things.
As I mentioned previously, I have had my eyes forced open wide many a time and had some tough learning curves to navigate. However being here now allows me to learn from experience, not blame and excuse, see the part I had to play and most importantly ensure I continue to learn and grow.
We need to always continue to learn about ourselves, learn how we react to certain circumstances and see if we like that person. If not then we need to improve, work on our best traits and figure out when and where they are their strongest. How do we handle stress? Do we get better or do we keep making the same mistakes.
Ultimately, great awareness comes down to two things. Learning to communicate and self-assessment. Observe your actions, experiences, analyse and always strive to improve. Listen and understand with empathy not sympathy.
Final tips from my own personal experiences
Focus on being more present to you can observe your language, your body language, your actions and your effort
If you make a mistake, apologise for it.
Listen to understand not to be heard
Make a daily journal of your wins and learnings. Always winning or learning. Never losing.
Play to your strengths, lead with your best traits and you will generally have better outcomes
Learn when it’s needed to be SELFLESS and SELFISH
‘Sorry’ and ‘Thank You’ are a universal language. Don’t underestimate them.
I love the quote “Adapt, improvise and overcome”. You will never always be perfect or approach things in a perfect way, but you can be AWARE.